Numb...

That's how I feel...numb... after this past week I really don't think I can handle much more. I'm so numb like I have no nerves what so ever. All I want to do is curl up with my Pooh Bear and my cat and go to sleep. I don't want to talk about this anymore. I don't want to think about this anymore. Why can't I be the type of parent who can just sweep things under the rug and forget about it all!

I want my little girl back. I want her to not have to worry about being pregnant. I want her to be a kid all over again. I miss our talks...I miss our shopping trips. I just miss her. She has changed. Sex does that to people and when your young and "in love" you don't think it changes you but it does. I can no longer think of her as an innocent little girl.

I can see a few positives to this situation...

1. They really do care for each other. It doesn't matter that they are so young..I feel they truly do love each other.

2. They used protection...so she does listen to some of my advice!!!

3. That even though our relationship has changed we'll be OK...we all just need to deal with this and move on.

And one day we will...but for now I'm going to have to grieve in a sense. I've lost her to the adult world and while I knew one day this would happen I was hoping for a bit more time with her. My childhood ended so very early in my life...I was trying to make hers different than mine was. I tried my best and I hope I've done of good job...I love her like crazy...it's so very hard to watch her grow up...